Why are people so quick to condemn???

I cant help but notice that people are so full of hate these days.i have had a kinda dodgy past and i know if someone was understanding(which is how i got myself back on track in the end) it would of been so much easier but people just want to condemn people.its mad.say for instance say a killer goes to court people are all like hang the f**cker.let him burn in hell.i cant understand how someone is so against what he does yet they want worse to him.2 wrongs dont make a right in my eyes.it does in some peoples eyes obviously.but if people were more understanding of peoples wrong doings(i dont mean killings)they would have a better chance of getting sorted out.condemning someone will only throw them in deeper into the water.say for instance an alcoholic who is by character good but has problems and gets in minor situations why are people so quick to condemn him.surely understanding and helping this man would be of more benefit to everyone.i just think people have too much hate in them

Why are people so quick to condemn???
Yes, I agree some people are very judgmental. However, we can not allow the thoughts and ideas of others suggest how we should feel about ourselves. What we know and feel about ourselves is what matters. Not what others think or feel about us. Reputation is what others think about us, Character is what we build for others to think about us. We control our character. Anyone who has had the opportunity to live life has made some mistakes or done some things they are not proud of. Unfortunately, life is not a rehearsal for the after life. We must live and learn. If you have learned from life, you have learned a valuable lesson. Mistakes are not to be continuously repeated, nor are they to be continuously lived. In regards to being within the court system, it is the job of the court system to judge. There are times when our choices have gotten us to the point of a court room, we obviously made poor choices and must deal with the consequences of our behaviors. For every action we take in life, there will be a reaction. We must first consider, is the reaction worth the action? We cannot control the actions, thoughts and ideas of others. Only of ourselves. Have a great day, and God bless****
Reply:Humanology of life.
Reply:Hey, have you ever heard of capital letters and punctuation? You ought to try it when you write.
Reply:Because they choose to live in ignorance, %26amp; have adopted the personal concepts of greed and hatred. People are mostly quick to judge, because they have not learned how to love others unconditionally. So many of us, love others with attachments. Let me please explain


Please take a few min. to patiently read this.


Thank You, and have a great week.





“Love vs. Attachment”





What in the world is the difference between loving a person and being attached to them ?


Love is the sincere wish for others to be happy, and to be free from suffering.


Having realistically recognized others' kindness as well as their faults, love is always focused on the other persons welfare. We have No ulterior motives to fulfull our self-interest, or to fulfill our desires; to love others simply because they exist.


Attachment, on the other hand, exaggertes others' good qualitities and makes us crave to be with them. When we're with them, we're happy, but when we're separated from them, we are often miserable. Attachment is linked with expectations of what others should be or do.


Is love as it is usually understood in our society


really love ? or attachment ? or even possibly for some, only lust.


Let us examine this a bit more. Generally we are attracted to people either because they have qualities we value or because they help us in some way. If we observe our own thought processes mindfully, and carefully - we'll notice that we look for specific qualities in others.


Some of these qualities we find attractive, others are those our parents, or society value.


We examine someone's looks, body, education,


financial situation, social status. This is how most of us decide on whether or not the person holds any true value to us.


In addition, we judge people as worthwhile according to how they relate to us. If they help us, praise us, make us feel secure, listen to what we have to say, care for us when we are sick or depressed, we consider them good people, and it is this type of people we are most likely to be more attracted to.





But this is very biased, for we judge them only in terms of how they relate to "us", as if we are the most important person in the world.


After we've judged certain people to be good for us, whenever we see them it appears to us as if goodness is coming from them, but if we are more aware, we recognize that we have projected this goodness onto them.





Desiring to be with the people alot who make us feel good, we become emotional yo-yo's -


when we're with these people, we're Up, when we're not with these people, we're Down.





Furthermore, we form fixed concepts of what our relationships with those people will be and thus have expectations of them. When they do not live up to our expectations of them, we're very disappointed, or may become angry !


We want them to change so that they will they will match what we think they are. But our projections and expectations come from our own minds, not from the other people.


Our problems arise not because others aren't


who we thought they we're, but because we mistakenly thought they were something they


aren't.


Checklist: "I Love You if __________ "


What we call love is most often attachment.


It is actually a disturbing attitude that overestamates the qualities of another person.


We then cling to tightly to that person, thinking our happiness depends on that person.


"Love, on the other hand, is an open and very calm, relaxed attitude. We want someone to be happy, and free from suffering simply because they exist. While attachment is uncontrolled and much too sentimental, Love is direct and powerful. Attachment obscures our judgment and we become impatient, angry, and impartial, helping only our dear one's and harming those who we don't like. Love builds up others, and clarifies our minds, and we


access a situation by thinking of the greatest good for everyone. Attachment is based on


selfishness, while Love is founded upon cherishing others, even those who do not look very appealing to the eyes. Love looks beyond


all the superficial appearences, and dwells on the fact that they are just like us: they want inner peace, happiness, and want to avoid suffering. If we see unattractive, dirty, ignorant people, we feel repulsed because our selfish minds watn to know attractive, intellectual, clean, and talented people. Love, on the other hand, never evaluates others by these superficial standards and looks much deeper into the person. Love recognizes that regardless of the others' appearances, their experience is the same as ours: they seek inner peace, to be happy, to be free from sufferings, and to do their best to avoid problems.


When we're attached, we're not mentally and emotionally free. We overly depend on and cling to another person to fulfill our mental and especially our emotional needs. We fear losing the person, feeling we'd be incomplete without him.


This does not mean that we should suppress our emotional needs or become aloof, alone and totally independent, for that too does not solve the problem. We must simply realize our unrealistic needs, and slowly seek to eliminate them. Some emotional needs may be so strong that they can't be dissolved immediately.


If we try to suppress them or pretend they do not exist, we become anxious, insecure, falling into a depression. In this case, we can do our best to fulfill our needs while simultaneously working gradually to subdue them.


"The core problem is we seek to be loved, rather than to love. We yearn to be understood by others rather than to understand them. In all honesty, our sense of emotional insecurities comes from the selfishness obscuring our own


minds. 'We can develop self-confidence by recognizing our inner potential to become a selfless human being with many, many magnificient qualities, then we'll develop a true and accurate feeling of self-confidence. And


then we'll seek to increase true love, without attachments, to increase compassion, to cultivate patience and understanding, as well as generousity, concentration and wisdom.'





'Under the influence of attachment we're bound by our emotional reactions to others. When they are nice to us, we're happy. When they ignore us, or speak sharply to us, we take it personally and are unhappy. But pasifying attachment doesn't mean we become hard-hearted. Rather, without attachment there will be space in our hearts and minds for genuine Affection and Impartial Love for them.


We'll be actively involved with them.


If we learn to subdue our attachments, we can most definately have successful friendships and personal relationships with others !! These relationships will be richer because of the freedom and respect - the relationships will be based on. We'll care about the happiness and the misery of all human beings equally, simply because everyone is the same in wanting and needing inner peace, happiness, and not wanting to suffer. However, our lifestyles and interests may be more compatible with those of some people more so than with others, and that is alright. In any case, our relationships will be based on mutual Love, mutual interests, and the wish to help each other in life.
Reply:By condemning others we avoid and deny the dark parts of ourselves. Take Andrea Yates, for example. Everyone was quick to turn her into a monster because no one wants to admit that they themselves have thought for one moment about killing their own children. That's a frightening thing to confront in yourself, but we've all been there. It takes much more courage and strength to identify with someone and be compassionate than it does to point the finger and condemn them because if we were to accept them and be compassionate we would also have to accept and be compassionate with ourselves.





~ FR
Reply:Yes. But I never understand why people seem to think execution is worse than a lifetime sentence in jail!! I would want to die of remorse and ask my Father's forgiveness. I don't get it!! Guess cause I'm not a killer maybe!! @8-)

hardware